Well, we’re coming to the end of November for another year and it’s about that time that all our handlebar haired friends of the male orientation start bringing in the charitable mula from their hairy monthed agendas.
Whilst I have been semi comatose for most of the month due to frightful encounters with my male friends whom I often mistook for Ivan Malat or some other equally disturbing criminal, I swept my indifference under the rug due to their socially conscious efforts to aid research in prostate cancer.
That was until recently when I discovered the charitable fad had indeed become a charitable faux. While boys across Australia have been taking the ‘path less shaven’ over the past month, I realise it is much more of a novelty for them than a deep seeded passion to help there less fortunate brothers against the fight of losing their manhood (to say the least).
There are not many things boys can do to ramp up their pretty. If they wear make up you’re probably more likely to find them on a shady corner on Oxford Street also sporting knee high fishnets and a head of bleached horsehair. If they over exaggerate on the hair styling and facials they end up drifting down the messy metro sexual river of the desperate and dateless. If their fashion seems forced we think they’re ignorant, clueless, socially anaemic and facing a quarter life crisis. It is no wonder they jump on this small opportunity to ‘change face’ like an old widow on a stray cat.

When I began to ask some moustache members how much money they had raised over the month most of them looked at me blankly. One young man who’s mo looked like it had been drawn on with a fading texter blatantly asked me ‘Are you spose to raise money are you?’.

When did the world get so turned up side down that we are turning sickness into a trend and charity into a fashion show?